How life can swiftly change so fast.
the sweetness and bitterness in life's undertakings.
It takes you by surprise and sweeps you off your feet,
then just dumps you into one corner to cry all by yourself.
and watch as people live their lives. and live them in such grandeur.
by that I do not mean of the material wealth that they have,
but grandeur and richness in what they believe in.
I have lost my dreams. my goals. my ambitions.
my hopes. my loves. my passion.
I have seen my life shattered in front of me.
by the person who claims to love you alot.
who's willing to give one's life for you. *so they say*
time after time after time. the pieces that were put back
shattered again and again and again. I guess it took a toll on my life.
I can't glue back the pieces anymore.
I feel so broken from the inside out. outside in.
I feel so alone. so abandoned. so deserted. so isolated.
without no one. I have my little one. but does she understand all these?
no, she is too young. too young to understand, or feel these things.
she may know if some thing's are off. and are not right.
but she will never understand or will I ever let her go through
the pain or the suffering I have gone through.
.never.again.
enough that I have gone through it alone. but not her.
I want the best for her. the best of what I can give.
all the happiness in the world. the laughter. the joy. the love.
not the sorrow. or the pain.
Right now I feel so numb.
I think it's just best for me to never feel again.
cos if I feel, I would have to feel the pain again. that is so deep.
that if I let it out, all the rage and destruction will come pouring out.
and hurt the people who love me, and those around me.
NEVER WILL I EVER FEEL AGAIN. FOR NO ONE.
NOT EVEN YOU. or YOU, or YOU.
NO BODY.
the sweetness and bitterness in life's undertakings.
It takes you by surprise and sweeps you off your feet,
then just dumps you into one corner to cry all by yourself.
and watch as people live their lives. and live them in such grandeur.
by that I do not mean of the material wealth that they have,
but grandeur and richness in what they believe in.
I have lost my dreams. my goals. my ambitions.
my hopes. my loves. my passion.
I have seen my life shattered in front of me.
by the person who claims to love you alot.
who's willing to give one's life for you. *so they say*
time after time after time. the pieces that were put back
shattered again and again and again. I guess it took a toll on my life.
I can't glue back the pieces anymore.
I feel so broken from the inside out. outside in.
I feel so alone. so abandoned. so deserted. so isolated.
without no one. I have my little one. but does she understand all these?
no, she is too young. too young to understand, or feel these things.
she may know if some thing's are off. and are not right.
but she will never understand or will I ever let her go through
the pain or the suffering I have gone through.
.never.again.
enough that I have gone through it alone. but not her.
I want the best for her. the best of what I can give.
all the happiness in the world. the laughter. the joy. the love.
not the sorrow. or the pain.
Right now I feel so numb.
I think it's just best for me to never feel again.
cos if I feel, I would have to feel the pain again. that is so deep.
that if I let it out, all the rage and destruction will come pouring out.
and hurt the people who love me, and those around me.
NEVER WILL I EVER FEEL AGAIN. FOR NO ONE.
NOT EVEN YOU. or YOU, or YOU.
NO BODY.
Labels: emotional times
"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
12:18 AM
12:18 AM
