+ + Broken.

I have completely lost all the respect I have for you.

From the day I could understand, when I lost my innocence, you were the one whom I looked up to, your strength, your sacrifices, your love and no matter how much you smacked me or how rebellious I was, no matter how much I went against you, or talked/fought back, I always held high regards for you. You were my everything, you still are :'(

To me you were the star of the show!

You always had everything in order, you were strong, and the strength you had always appealed to me. I wanted to be as strong as you, to be able to go through all kinds of shit and still make it through at the end of the day. and here I am..still pulling through and hanging on. staying strong. and I have you to thank for that.

but what you're doing today, at this moment of time. it crushes me from deep within, all the teachings, advises and words of wisdom went poof Everything you've taught me, the values. ALL THE VALUES! all the values you've so highly regarded as RIGHT, just got flushed down the drain. I'm just so disappointed with you right now. I don't know if I can ever forgive you. I guess I will, but I don't know when that would be.

I am broken to the core.

Labels: ramblings

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
11:40 PM

posted by feanorayomi @ 11:40 PM 1 chocolates

+ + Eat Bird Shit.

Pay's coming in soon. and when it does,

I so have to start budgeting, no more extra spending.

I need a alot of things, and when I say I need..I mean it.

I also need to pay for tons of stuff -_-" sighs.

What I want real bad right now, are braces :'(

and maybe a real term break holiday.

I feel so tired and exhausted.

I don't get hugs that often anymore, neither kisses.

sometimes I feel its as though I'm single.

I'm off now, btw he hasn't called me for the whole day.

He only texted me like erm twice today? -___-"

that was also because I texted him first. sighs.

I feel like giving up already. sometimes I just feel that

its useless to hang on to something I feel is precious

when the other party doesn't seem to give a damn.

I guess sometimes loving someone is not enough.

goodnights people.hoping for better tomoro *fingers crossed*

p/s: I just found out that this guy who was flirting with me,

is my gf's bf's older brother -_-" how small can the world be.

Labels: ramblings

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
9:35 PM

posted by feanorayomi @ 9:35 PM 2 chocolates

+ + Thoughts.

When you fall in love, it is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake, and then it subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the desire to mate every second of the day. It is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every part of your body. No… don’t blush. I am telling you some truths. For that is just being in love; which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over, when being in love has burned away.

Captain Corelli’s Mandolin (via quotewhore)

Labels: ramblings

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
2:48 PM

posted by feanorayomi @ 2:48 PM 0 chocolates

+ + Ramblings at 3AM

(via gatekeeper) “I’ll go out there and make my mistakes. I’ll fall down, get hurt, cry, laugh, love, and get back up. I’ll stand on the highest mountaintop and go into the deepest caverns. I’ll roam across the world, visit the moon and swim in outer space. I’ll let my imagination run wild and let my spirit soar. Why? Because when my life flashes before my eyes in those final moments, I want to have something worthwhile to watch, with plenty of love and laughter, good times and bad. I don’t want to regret a thing and I plan not to. Remember, it’s not usually the things you do that you regret, it’s the things you don’t do and leave unsaid. Laugh out loud. Cry in the rain. Love with all your heart and soul. Get hurt. Tell the truth. Go crazy. But never forget that you only get one shot. One shot at this day, one shot at this minute. One shot at this age. One shot at life. So make sure your life is one you will enjoy watching in your final moments.” Anna Floyd

“I’ll go out there and make my mistakes. I’ll fall down, get hurt, cry, laugh, love, and get back up. I’ll stand on the highest mountaintop and go into the deepest caverns. I’ll roam across the world, visit the moon and swim in outer space. I’ll let my imagination run wild and let my spirit soar.

Why? Because when my life flashes before my eyes in those final moments, I want to have something worthwhile to watch, with plenty of love and laughter, good times and bad. I don’t want to regret a thing and I plan not to.

Remember, it’s not usually the things you do that you regret, it’s the things you don’t do and leave unsaid. Laugh out loud. Cry in the rain. Love with all your heart and soul. Get hurt. Tell the truth. Go crazy. But never forget that you only get one shot. One shot at this day, one shot at this minute. One shot at this age. One shot at life. So make sure your life is one you will enjoy watching in your final moments.”

Anna Floyd

p/s: falling in love with tumblr :)

Labels: ramblings

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
3:18 AM

posted by feanorayomi @ 3:18 AM 0 chocolates

+ + fcuked.

Today was a good day in whole, but it ended quite dreadfully. I don't know, there are so many things going on in my mind. My interview for the nursing scholarship is so freagging near and I don't have any bloody guarantors! and mind you, they need to earn at least RM2500! How am I gonna find guarantors who earn that much in such little time?! huhu T.T

Well. maybe to some of you it might not be a big deal as you may know "big" people, but someone like me knows that I have to start just trusting in God. continue praying hard and still try my best to find a qualified guarantor -____-"

I'm so fcuked.

I'm so bloody stressed about everything at the moment. I don't know. and nobody seems to be able to understand me! (I don't expect them to :S) with me being all tensed and all, the little one's paying the price as well. I'm so detached, mooody, cynical, sarcastic and morbid. my love ones are paying the price. That kinda sucks.

On a better note on things, have been pretty hooked AGAIN, to this song by U2 - One, the one where Bono did a duet with Mary J. Blige was kinda soul touching, and the duet with Sting was awesome too! but I still would prefer their original. and right now..I'm just hooked.

U2 - One

Is it getting better, or do you feel the same
Will it make it easier on you now
You got someone to blame
You say...

One love, One life
When it's one need, in the night,
One love, we get to share it,
Leaves you baby if you, don't care for it,

Did I disappoint you
Or leave a bad taste in your mouth
You act like you never had love
And you want me to go without
Well it's...

Too late, Tonight
To drag the past out into the light
We're one, but we're not the same
We get to carry each other, carry each other
One...

Have you come here for forgiveness
Have you come to raise the dead
Have you come here to play Jesus
To the lepers in your head

Did I ask too much, more than a lot
You gave me nothing, now it's all I got
We're one, but we're not the same
Well we, hurt each other
Then we do it again
You say..

Love is a temple, Love a higher law
Love is a temple, Love the higher law
You ask me to enter, but then you make me crawl
And I can't be holding on, to what you got
When all you got is hurt

One love, One blood
One life, you got to do what you should
One life, with each other
Sisters, Brothers
One life, but we're not the same
We get to carry each other, carry each other

One Life, One...

I so need a hug right now. It's 2:35am in the morning, am not sleeping when I have morning shift tomorrow -____-" argh. I'm so tired, but not sleepy..huehuehue. I feel so lonely. Well, besides it's only Jesus who can fill this empty donut hole. a perfect fit for the not so perfect soul :'( sighs. goodnight people.

Labels: emotional times, ramblings, rantings, scholarship, thoughts

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
11:42 PM

posted by feanorayomi @ 11:42 PM 0 chocolates

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I'm a child of God, I'm in love with him, I love my baby, I'm a friend, I'm a lover, I'm a daughter, I'm a mother, I'm amazing XD I'm a huge chocolate ice-cream beach fan, I love music, I love art, I love photograpy, I love travelling, I love shopping, I'm crazy, I'm fun-loving, I'm out-going, I'm working to become who I want to be, financially free by 30 XD

She's my love, She's my life, She's my everything, She's a gift, She's a blessing from heaven. I love her to bits, every part of me lives and breathes for her. I love you sweet Shiloh Trianna Wong

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