I feel like throwing myself into traffic.
Cutting myself into tiny shreds of cloth.
This is all too much for me to bear.
I'm breaking down. I'm hurting.
I'm not ashame to say it.
I cannot let it go. You affected me so badly this time.
I don't know what you want from me anymore.

I give up.

edit/
a forwarded email I received.
really encouraged me. to keep pushing on.


Amen.

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
1:14 AM

I've been really busy these past few days and blogging is definately not one of the reasons. Haha, unlike before when I had nothing to do..just look after baby bubs, sit in front of the lappy and watch tv doing nothing. haha. am now in the school's library waiting for my next class at 4pm. damn sien lor.

Orientation was on Friday as some of you know. it was alright but kinda sucked at the same time as I and the other 8 Sarawakian girls were not able to paricipate in the games. since we were not finished with our registration. but other than that it was alright. There was this wonderfully nice young man, name Faizal and he practically ran up and down campus just to help us settle with our registration and classes. It was awefully kind of him to help.

Elif came down on Saturday for a weekend all expense paid trip =) it was really fun having him around, if only Louis could have come along as well den I bet it would have been a bomb! haha. We brought him to Sentosa to have a look see and to the beaches. Them both Elif and Denise were too tired to do anything fun packed so we took a more peaceful option which was to the Underwater World and the Dolphin Lagoon. It was quite fun.

The weather was so freaking hot man! and humid too. I miss Kuching rain already. when evenings would be so windy and breezy. here its one freaking oven! -_-" sweating all over, the walk down Siloso Beach was a torture! and unfortunately for us, it was a Sunday so...yes, noisy talking Filipino Maid's accompanied by either their Ang Moh scandals or Bangladeshi boyfriend's and hot humid weather do not go well with me. I got pretty annoyed =.=" and irritated. but overall it was a good trip =) hope to have Elif down Singapore some time soon. haha.

Afterwards, in the evening I took the bus down to Johor Bahru to deposit some cash for Mum, as baby bub's milk was about to finish that evening. The new JB custom is so damn far now lor. but it definitely looks better than the old one XD haha. I mean seriously way way nicer lor. and it's a direct link to City Square. no need walk across the old dirty road. hehe.

After walking around a bit, quickly hurried back to Singapore to meet up with Khalid for a while and then meet up with Denise and Elif for dinner. but they came by late so ended up having dinner with Khalid instead. Helped ourselves to Subway's =) gosh I miss Subways! hehe.

I'll upload pictures soon in my next post.

I forgot to bring the cable today.

p/s: timing for my classes today kinda sucks. had one early this morning at 9am (lecture) and then now have to wait till 4pm (tutorial) for my next class -__-" damn bored lor. thank God got free computer. haha.

Well, gotta go now. Gonna go read up some books that were recommended by the lecturer this morning. After this morning's lecture, Nursing doesn't look that easy anymore. not to say it was easy to begin with but am just getting nervous. hopefully by God's grace and a whole lot of studying, I'll pass with a GPA of 3.5 and above! Failing --> NOT AN OPTION =.="

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
2:28 PM

A short pause from the long posts.

I'm kinda getting bored of my current blog.
I might move. Was thinking Tumblr ^__^v
it seems quite interesting. and different.
I've already opened an account quite some time ago
but I'll have to see about that though.
(I've put alot of effort into this blog!)

Anyways am done with my passport.
collected them this morning (mine and baby bubs')
I'm pretty much settled with my agent fee.
the $ $ $ Denise loaned me came through yesterday evening.
so yeah. I'm pretty good to go! =)

I'm flying! SOON...
I'm so gonna miss the little one!



I seriously don't know how I'd cope without her.
She's been my strength all this while.
The reason, I have been standing strong..
She's also been pretty attached to me recently.
It's as though she can sense that I'm leaving..
I feel like crying now. Things are gonna be so different :'(

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
3:40 PM

The movie reminds me of the people we meet in life. The good and the ad. Tbhe ones who hold you dear, and the ones who just take you for granted. It reminds me of the friends that I have. Those that change your life and make an impact, and those that just abuse you, use you and desert you. I'm no saint but I can say that I do not judge a book by its cover.

I've met all sorts of people in my life. and been judge by alot of people and as well as those who call themselves my friends. Christian or not. It's all the same. People, who do not look at the whole picture but judge right away by the minor details they do not think is right. the things they want to see. the things they want to hear. People like these do not look at the mistakes they make or the way they live, they just look at all the wrong OTHER people other than themselves make.wth.


Well..on a better, less sad note. Monday was my last day at Padini's :'( actually really kinda sad to leave.but you guys know right, that I'll never forget all of you there? ^_____^v honestly it has been the best most awesome-mest experience ever. I mean, remember those days when I had first started working? the days when I use to dread going to work..

I made really good friends! and I thank God so much for giving me the opportunity to work with such awesome people like them - Reenee, Tina, Connie, Kelvin, Duay from the Operation Team and such an open minded (sensitive) Branch Manager like Lawrence ^______^v and the rest of the staff at Padini. Thanks everyone for such an awesome experience :)
Well, am going to sleep now..slept at 4am yesterday night and spent the whole day looking after the little one (who's not feeling well - down with flu, a bad cough and high fever - but still ever so cute!) I've got a long day ahead..maybe go to the doctor's tomorrow, just maybe. If I have enough :'( cos my check not out yet..well goodnight then :)

xoxo
goodnights..

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
12:14 AM

This has been the best weekend I've had in a long time.

Bestie Denise dropped by for the weekend trip from Singapore. I can't believe its been 6months since I last saw her -_____-" time flies so fast! (babe, you are not fat -____-" you look stunning) Well it was a quick decision for her to come down. airfare was gawd damn cheap and before you know it, she was here. my replacement off day was sooooo last minute as well. but everything turned out well, thanks to some of my colleugues who were kind enough to cover for me :)

Like I said, time flies so fast! Well, with her being back for 3days was quite a rush but all fared well. We went for drinks, went to have steamboat, went to the beach (randomly) and went to have pork rice although the one that we wanted to go to was closed. it was all fun anyways :)

Life has not been easy for me but I thank God for everything that has happened. One thing I have learn is that everything happens in its own time. Gosh, listen to me talk! I feel like a hypocrite. I mean, I have to admit that I am not a patient person but I guess God is training me everyday for what's to come in the future. I am certain that He has big plans for me, though I may not see it now but I believe in Him, I believe Him. I believe that He loves me enough to take care of me. like the birds of the air and the flowers that bloom in spring. and I shall not doubt. Let me rephrase that, I shall try my best not to doubt Him.

p/s: though I was mean, thank you for trying your best to make me read my bible -____-" feel so unholy man! geez.

Anyways am now in Starbucks, connection at home got disconnected cos Dad forgot to pay the bills but of well, doesn't really matter anyway, kinda helps me to give more of my attention to the little one at home. I've been paying to much attention to Mr.Someone or more of like issues regarding with that Mr.Someone that now, I guess I'm not as interesting to him as I was before. I don't know -_____-" whatever I guess.

I gotta go now. Life sucks but life sure is a beauty as well :)

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
7:07 PM

The weather has been really WET these days, raining every freaking day. Today was the first day in quite some time that it stopped for a time being. Like the eye of a hurricane..finally got some clothes to hang and dry in time. If not all soggy and smelly and then have to wash again -_____-" no point. wasting detergent. cheh.

Anyways just to make it official, since my bestfriend already knows about it. so no big surprise. Yes, I got accepted for the Asean Nursing Scholarship. out of a few hundred applicants, I was chosen for the top 20 spots for the interview and out of the 20, I was amongst the chosen 10 for the scholarship. and I'll be leaving in March. I'm not sure when, but I sure can't wait.

All I have to do now is just wait it out. Cos some of the younger ones (only 17) have just finished their SPM and are waiting for their results. so I have to wait along too. Haha. and then we'll all be flying together as a group to Singapore in March.

Well, what I found out about the Asean Nursing Scholarship during the briefing was that, it has been around for 10years. Yes, the Singaporean government - God bless their hearts - have been giving this scholarship for about 10years already..but this is their first time offering it in Sarawak. They have been going to Myanmar and China for the past 9years and his year, before they decided to try Kuching, Sarawak out.

How blessed am I. It's as though God planned everything for me.
God is good. I mean, how blind was I all this time. He was planning every step. I just couldn't see it. I was blinded by all the negativity. It's so hard you know, to keep positive. Keep praying for me. please :'(

I mean, I could have gotten a job in Singapore and missed this chance of furthering and continuing my studies again. and be working a sucky job for the rest of my life! but I got this. I got blessed with this. by His grace :) I'm blessed.


Well, the little one has finally got her hands working XD she started doing the "twinkle twinkle little star" finger movements today. So cute! :) She's growing so fast, coming 8months on the 20th of this month. I can't believe my eyes actually. Gosh, and I still can't believe the fact that I'm a mum. already. at the age of 21years.

Never had imagine my life to be this way. Through the trials and tribulations. I guess life turned out better than I expected it to be. People, I know I'm in no position to say this since I have also been ranting and rambling and complaining about how bad life is,

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
2:01 AM

Christmas is here. and it does not seem to be any different than any other day. Mum and Dad's in front of the tv as usual. and the siblings are doing their own thing. So yeah, it's just like any other day. to Marcus, thanks for telling me. it's like another Christmas. cos it is Christmas after all.

Anyways tthe Christmas Tree is finally up. helped to put up the lights. but other than that, the Christmas spirit is gone - it got blown away with the wind. I just feel that this year round, nothing seems to be working out. I can't decide on my future yet. I'm now just awaiting the interview for the Nursing Scholarship. I really hope to get in. Pray for me.

Well, besides that. On a better note, things are just stalemate between me and Khalid. I know I said before, earlier on that I've broken up with Khalid but it seems that he does not want to let go just yet. as for me, I'm just numb. Can't feel anything and I can't seem to shed anymore tears. I guess I've cried my fill already when I was pregnant with the little one.

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
11:58 PM

work was kinda alright today. I know it was alright yesterday and I sounded like shit. but it was an alright-alright, instead of just an alright kinda day. get me? nvm. well, today I met a number of people that I have not met for ages. and it was good. more of refreshing.

Sim Siew Ling. love..it has been, say what..almost 5years since I last saw you! :) it was really nice meeting you again. oh, do takecare of yourself and have fun studying in KL..yeah.

Alicia Augustine. darling..finally we meet on good terms. but it was a good short meet up :) btw, you looked gorgeous. the days of dull-simplicity-with-no-makeup-on are over! XD hope to see you soon iyeah..mwahs ♥ .

anyways, I manage to pull myself into MNG and hello hello, finally got something. and yes, am very pleased with my buy. a nice dress. although after discount the price is kinda pricey but it's worth it. cos I'm happy. cos retail shopping worked for me again. yay! for me. I think. or maybe that's just for the time being. but for the time being is good.

and another thing. today I thought I had no more money left in my bank. since mum lost her atm card, and she can't withdraw anymore money. I being the filial daughter (oh so perasan) I am. I gave her what I could give. let's say about a hundred ringgit. and I was left with, lets say ten ringgit. needless to say, I was broke.

anyways after dropping mum off at the hospital. dropped by The Spring and made my way to the atm machine. to quickly withdraw the money I had left to get the little one's milk as it was finishing quickly, well after doing all the necessary cucuk-ing..I was dumbfound to find out that there was a little bit more money than I had expected. so praise the Lord. I can survive. till the end of the month. haha XD amazing. wonder how it got there anyways.

well, it's gonna be another long day for me again. tomorrow. and btw, I'm considering quitting Padini. It's getting boring and lifeless. although it has its good times. all good times have got to come to an end. because I don't want to be 30years old still standing at the cashier counter asking, "Hello, do you have a Padini Membership Card?" so God Bless You Padini.

and I'm such a procastinator. I've yet to send in my results and photos for the Nursing Scholarship Program. God Bless Me. Sarah, you gotta get a grip. oh bummer -_____-" I feel lazy. sigh.

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
11:48 PM

I am so not anti-social
but I am currently hanging out at Starbucks
all on my own. Thought I'd just chill for a bit
before heading on home and continue carrying out
my motherly duties to the little one :)
hey, sometimes a mother's gotta have a break ok!



am trying their Toffee Nut Frappucino.
not bad actually :) also helped myself to a
Chocolate Donut ^^V just a small amount of pampering
won't hurt..right? haha. But I'm enjoying myself.
It's been a while since I've got time to just chill.
without stress in sight!



since Mum in in KL at this moment for her business meeting
9on behalf of me as well) I'm kinda in awe with myself.
I mean, am not boasting or whatever
but I'm proud of myself that I can handle things at home
with the little one without my mum's help!
It's not that my mum has been doing everything (I do things myself ok!)
but usually I need some help..so yeah you get what I mean -_____-"

oh, btw..I just realised that the little one is so fun to camwhore with.
she makes the most adorable faces, like EVER! ^^V
hahaha. will update again when I get home.
.mwahs.

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
6:56 PM

I feel as though my life, which was meant for something greater than this is never gonna get to where it's supposed to be. I'm suppose to be in my prime years, studying, excelling and fulfilling my dreams but am now feeling at my lowest - starts to get all emo - bah.

Things at work have been great until now. "someone" from somewhere came back after she finished helping out the new Padini Concept Store which opened recently @ One Borneo in Sabah. Anyway, she hates the person who introduced me to my current jo, and now it seems like she's taking it out on me. How do I deal with it?! ish.

I have a surprise. for you. for me. for everyone who's reading this. Khalid sorta, kinda proposed. yeah, you heard me..he proposed. It's finally official. He wants to marry me. I'm not saying that he didnt want to marry me before, but I mean..he wanted to wait and all. so now when he suddenly says he wants to marry me, I'm in total shock!

I'm not too sure if he has talked to my parents yet but I hope he does things the traditional way, like ask my parents for my hand in marriage before actually popping out the ring. Though it may seem old school, old school is sometimes really romantic.

But as for right now, I'm feeling confused. I have been waiting for this day for as long as I can remember. now that THAT DAY has come, I'm panicking! How will it be when I finally marry him? How will I face his parents? How about our religions? Will I have to convert? (I DON'T WANT TO CONVERT - no matter how much I love you Khalid, I will never convert into Islam *no offence* cos I LOVE MY JESUS!)

Will our marriage be able to last? Will we be able to solve our problems without ever the thought of divorce? I don't want a failed marriage. and I don't want to marry just because of the little one. yet no matter how much he convinces me. I'm never satisfied ebough to be convinced!

I'm so young yet I have chosen the road to mature faster than ever. It's like you know those games where you step on an accelerator and you just ZOOM! past the finishing line? like the ones in Pet Society's hurdle races? -____________-" I know I'm lame, but yeah it's like one of those. If you get what I mean. huhu :'( I need comfort. I need a hug. I need someone to just tell me that everything is gonna turn out fine. I need someone from the future to tell me that I'll make the right decision, and everything will be okay! *sighs*

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
1:24 PM

This is so super happening saddening!
Tiger Airways is having bloody super damn cheap fares!
I mean it, from Kuching-Singapore-Kuching
only MYR69 for one way, and MYR138 for to and fro.
VERY SUPER GAWD DAMN CHEAP rite?!?!?!?!
but the thing that sucks is that,
because I am not a confirmed staff of Padini Concept Store, yet...
I cannot take unpaid leave so therefore I cannot go.
Why like that wei?! *heaves a huge sigh*
-______________________-"

So I thought to myself, since I cannot make it for just simply any flight,
I'll just take the flights that are according to my shift.
Well the plan I thought of was like this;

Wednesday: morning shift (leaves for airport right after work)
Thursday: off day!! *woot woot* (spend the whole day with Khalid)
Friday: afternoon shift (leave for Kuching and return to work in the afternoon)

but but but

cheap flights from Tiger Airways do not have early morning flights nor early afternoon flights -______-" super super sad. departure nor arrival. so now how then?! now cannot go anymore liao lor!! huhu. I'm still figuring out a way to go off for just 3days at least.

well all of you must be wondering why in the world am I so excited over some cheapo fare tickets to Singapore (eh, MYR139 for two ways is damn cheap lor) actually, the real reason is that since number one, the fares are so super cheap and number two, was thinking of bringing the little one to see her daddy :) yeah thats why the sudden rush, the sudden excitement, and all the suddenly's. hohohohoho...

*sighs* now what in the world am I suppose to do ah? how then sia?! wtfreak. I want to go so badly. I want to meet Khalid so badly! I want the little one to meet her daddy so badly! I want I want I want - macam lah throwing temper will help anything?! *annoyed with self*

Till you hear from me, will tell you tomorrow..am gonna sleep now. Just did a full shift today, from 9:30AM to 10PM. Tomorrow am doing the morning shift..I'm so exhausted. thank God will be having my off day after that..wow whee~

*************************************************************************************


p/s: The Little One can sit now..will upload a picture of her sitting down & playing soon ^__^v she tends to put about everything and anything she can find in her path, into her mouth these days (especially paper)...so curious about everything!!

she has learnt to say "BABA" and "MAMA" continuously now without teaching. she can recognise faces too, and has learnt to manje with me so much more when I'm home from work (feels so good to be loved, unconditionally) - she stretches out her hand to hold me or ask me to carry her :) mummy loves you too sweetheart.

she loves to look at herself in the mirror and then bursts out chuckling and laughing and giggling. awesomely cute. sometimes I think she thinks that there's another baby on the other side of the mirror! haha XD

she eats more solids now - bubur hancur with fish, chicken, broccolli, carrots and BOVRIL! :) - and everytime she sees us eat, she'll stretch out her hand to ask. super adorable lah.

she's growing every single day, pretty soon she'll be crawling, then walking, then talking, then asking and demanding - I hope so not! - going to school, dating boys, going to college/ university, getting the education she deserves, getting a good job and before I know it..she'll be marrying someone. O M G ! ! ! I can't believe I'll be going through all these with her. I STILL CANT BELIEVE I'M A MUM!! It still seems so surreal many times. my head is spinning now. okay enough of the future. now let it be just me and her, stop time and stay like this forever!

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
11:48 PM

I had the Dark Cherry Mocha Frappucino today.
I am happy as can be. and I am addicted!
I shall have more..real SOON,
muahahahaha *evil laughter echoes*



Thus because of the very-so-the-sedap
DARK CHERRY MOCHA FRAPPUCINO,
go try at Starbucks @ The Spring. they are so ready for Christmas..
has anyone bought me presents yet? eheks -____-"
I am awake this late EARLY in the morning..
I gotta get some sleep.
Work at 9:30AM later!
and I have to wash my hair some more
-_____________-"
goodnight loves.

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
2:22 AM

Talk about the lamest thing ever! I still feel really annoyed because of my EX's current gf. I mean what have I done to deserve being called "IT"?! she went calling me "IT" again saying that she's dreading the weekend, one of the reasons was that because I am now working at one of her favourite stores! HELLO? If you tak suke, you pergi KL and shop lah!! lame.

Anyway on a better note, things are going great at work, have been hanging out mostly with my Operation Executives..but relationship with my colleagues are great as well :) other than that, I have been reserving alot of stuff..to get by end of this month. Some more got specific discount for staff which customers cannot get. haha. I'm not telling you..huahuahua XD but the thing is that I haven't earn yet, already reserving! haha. Oh well..

Well, just to let those of you who are reading my blog know..I've started work at Padini One Concept Store as an Operations Assistant for about a week now. and although I don't really plan to stay long..lets say maximum ONE YEAR. I'm here to gain experience as well as get a good referral for my resume :) I mean I gotta think of what's ahead right? I definitely don't plan to stay for too long, I still want to study and all. Just wish me luck alright :)

Anyways, I had my off day yesterday so we (me, my sister, Lydia, Irena) went to to Food and Tea for dinner then hung out at Padini for a while. We then headed down to Bing! for a drink, we were joined by Duay and Lydia's cousin, Destin..actually we were suppose to go out for a movie and to be specific, out to watch 007, Quantum of Solace but "somebody" (which was Lydia's cousin, Destin) only took his shower at 10:30PM so memanglah tak sempat right -_____-" so we skipped the movie part. Maybe next time, the movie theater is most probably pack anyways since yesterday was the screening. Well, so far this week has turned out great :)

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
1:00 AM

I always think.
and this time I think I am experiencing mid-life crisis earlier than I would've ever thought.

at times I would be so happy with my life. I have the right person next to me right now, and I am doing what likIe. although spending 90% of your life in the studio might get frustrating, I am still happy. happy because I am not sleeping outside in the cold, happy because I am not standing on the streets asking for quarters from strangers, happy because I am not starving and digging out food from the garbage. but other times I would be wishing I had a much better life; an entirely different one perhaps. I would think my life is a living hell, I would complain and rant to my poor other half.

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
12:51 AM

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
1:23 AM

For you who don't know anything on what's happening with me and yet try your best to assume on what's been happening, please stop dreaming that my life is at its worst! I have never been happier, I mean that - seriously. I have a man that loves me and a baby that is as adorable as EVER.

How people can be so spiteful, just because they are insecure and unassure of themselves. I stumbled upon "somebody's" blog today. I got the biggest shock of my life when this person whom I have never offended before, thought that I was spreading rumours about my ex. to my colleugues. Erm, HELLO! reality check! Why would I want to talk about him?!

Well she referred to me as "IT" so she went ranting on about how she was shocked to have met me so unexpectedly, and how I told my coluegues about my ex and that my colleugues were assuming that my ex's life was worse than before being with her compared to how when he was with me..yada yada yada.

But how could she have known on what I was telling my colleugues when she was so near far away from where I was at. For those of you who have been in the Padini Concept Store @ The Spring you will know how far we were from each other! I was at the cashier counter while she was either at Padini Authentics browsing around for slippers, or at SEED looking for clothes, if I'm not mistaken. I mean, unless you have super hearing senses or you are able to listen to voices from so far away could you have known about what I was talking about.

So my dear, for your information, all I told them (my colleugues) was that the guy, who was in green, was my ex, and that YOU, were his current gf, and then we went on talking about how I met Khalid in Singapore and how I left "my EX" for Khalid. I also told them that "my EX" is better off with you and I am better off with Khalid as we are much happier this way, there wouldn't have been a reason to stay together if we were fighting almost everyday.

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
4:22 PM

Guess what. I saw my EX today, at work.
after such a long time! I was like O M G ! ! !

In a way I was kinda shock to see him, but seeing him gave me such a relief, its as though a huge burden was taken off my shoulders. I mean, don't get me wrong..we did break up on good terms but the both of us still had this attachment towards each other after that. and that attachment did not break off as well as it should have gone.

Anyways it was good to see him again, happier and better off when he was with me. I guess if I had never gone to Singapore, we would have still been together and that would not have done us any good at all...now looking back at the relationship we were in. We did love each other but the relationship we were in did not bring us anything that was positive.



People move on you know, I'm definitely happy with Khalid. and I have never been happier in my life, with a man whom I know loves me to bits and is willing to sacrifice anything and everything he has in his control for me :) and as for my EX, I'm sure he's happy with his current gf and I wish him all the best and all the happiness there is in the world.

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
12:48 AM

Apparently as some of you may know, I have finally found a job and have already been working for the past week or so. I was pretty much excited about starting work and all but now that I have already gotten the job, I'm thinking again. I don't know, it's currently all mixed emotions. Like ROJAK, know what's ROJAK? Ok, I show you..wait.


I mean you guys may think that I'm really unappreciative of what I have but..its not that, I do thank God for the job, for such a good Retail Manager and Operations Executive but I'm practically doing nothing much but just standing at the counter. for the whole day. I want it busy, I want it to be BUSY. Cos if its not I just feel that you know, I'd rather be at home just spending time with my daughter. my Baby Love. I miss her so much every single time I'm at work. Always thinking of her..I'm serious I tell you.

Another thing is that I am also missing Singapore very much. Everytime I think of Singapore, I feel like crying and the "rasa rindu" datang balik. I just can't help it. You know though I worked really hard and at odd hours of the day but I loved my job. I love meeting the people there and the customers I had were always really nice to me :) I miss all of you back there..sighs.

I don't know. Will update again when I finally figure out what I'm feeling and where my emotions are at but for the time being, we shall just wait and see how things go, and how things proceed. For the better or for the worse. We'll see iyeah. Hrmm...

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
12:28 AM

Alright. I didn't just simply copy and paste from

*base*



*2nd base with pillars*









*2nd storey in the making*





*3rd base in the making*

*now you've got the 4th storey*

*ta-daa, you've got the 5th base already*

*7th storey and so forth*

*jeng jeng jeng jeng! salad for 10 people!!*


AND NOW FOR THE AMAZING ONES.
YOU'LL BE AWE STRUCK!!
trust me.




* NOW YOU GOT A PAGODA!!*

*and INTRODUCING the PAGODA WITH SNOW!!*

I did warn you that you would be..
YOU SHALL BE SHOCKED and AMAZED!

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
11:17 PM

I goggled this right after seeing my mum shed tears, I asked her why she's crying ( I knew it was a commercial but didn't know which one) and she told me it was a Petronas Commercial for Deepavali 2008.

so now I finally got a chance to see it. and boy oh boy did tears start rolling down my cheeks. I cried -_____-" but seriously its touching. You'll get what I mean after watching it.

In a way I'm proud of the Malaysian young people who have been coming up with such many wonderful funny, touching commercials every time an occasion like Chinese New Year, Hari Raya Aidilfitri, Deepavali and so forth comes up. Cheers! to you guys out there. Great work..

"Coz you are the Brightest Star and I'm in love with who you are."
6:58 PM